What to Get Her for Christmas

Coaching is good.
Having an Angel is better.
Being an Angel is the most fun of all!

As the Christmas season approaches, take a look at the gifts Andre gives his friends:

REGIFTING: What's up with that (euphemism)?

REGIFTING

ARE
YOU
ABOUT
TO
GIVE
SOMEONE
A GIFT
SOMEONE
ELSE GAVE YOU?

Your coach interprets reality, situations and emotions to you with words. We all use language. It is powerful.

Several blogs ago, we listed the incredible 13 most-requested words and phrases for translation.

Now we will take another look at language. It is how we make order out of chaos (Remember the Bible ... first there was chaos, then there was the Word"?

It is also how we shape our world. Words give us power over our people, emotions and world. (Name it, tame it) Remember the change in things when your toddler learned the almighty "NO!"?

A little history ... Do you know what the word "segregation" means? A massive social and cultural upheaval took place when the word "integration" was born?

Were you around when everything you read referred to the male gender. Quotes were: Let he who is without sin cast the first stone.If a person wanted to be a lay reader "he should speak to Father John." There were no female doctors, lawyers, ministers. "She" was not used unless it specifically referred to a woman.

A massive social and cultural upheaval took place when women began to demand that SHE and HER be added to the English vocabulary, and for the generic. We went through a stage of: (s)he and she/he, and "where it says "he" it should be construed to mean "she" as well, and sometimes we alternate, and sometimes use words like "an individual" It's awkward. This one has been a long, long journey for the USA and Western World.

Then in the 80s the divorce rate started rising. Suddenly we had people we had been married to and no longer were (and their parents), and then we remarried and had kids from both parents and we had ...??? A massive social and cultural upheaval lacked language, and we invented and began to use the words "ex" and "step-parent" and "blended family" and "single parent."

BTW in 1985, my friend (who was a single parent at the time) tells me that there was a Family Group at her Church, and she and her daughters were not allowed to join it. They were told "You are not a family." Ouch!

So here is a new one.

Get ready for this one.

It's a sign of the times, the long and bending back of etiquette and socially acceptable behavior, the limits of faux pas, the generational gaps, and -- some would have us believe, of hard economic times.

There is yet another new word: regifting. It is so new it did not pass my spellchecker, with or without hyphen. There is even a website called regiftable.com."

Re-gifting: It's not so taboo," is the article in the Keller Citizen, where they quote a communication specialist with Money Management International who, ungrammatically says, "More and more peple are considering all their options in gift-giving, and re-gifting is gaining popularity in that."

And of course the most obvious thing to re-gift is a gift-card. This is giant step away from knitting a sweater for you son for Christmas! Something chosen and made for exactly and only the person to whom it was given.

The article offers tips if you are going to do this -- like be sure and change the wrapping paper, and don't give it to someone who might know the someone who gave it to you.

Well, I gotta admit nearly every gift I have gotten from an employer (back when I had one), I gave to the maid, or a neighbor. The cheap hams and turkeys, the boxes of candy, the wine I wouldn't want to drink. But these aren't personal. This year I got a huge ham from one of the corporations I consult for and I don't like ham enough to have 20 lbs. of it around the house when it's only me. I knew someone else could get some use out of it. I gave it to my son. I'll admit to having done it with other things. I do, as they 'recommend,' suit the re-gift to the re-cipient. The thing is, I usually don't act like it's a real gift. I say, "I got this and blah blah and thought you might like it/could use it/would enjoy it more than me."

However at times I have gotten, say, a sweater or something from my side of the family that I knew I would never wear, but that my mother-in-law would love, so I wrapped it up again and gave it to her.

Call me a Re-Gifter?

My etiquette advice: Just do it with taste! i.e., do not let the person who gave it to you know about it, and don't tell the person you're giving it to, and be sure neither of them will find out about it. Because that would be incredibly rude.

Christmas Gifts for Older Gents

From today's mailbag - what to buy an older gentleman. There are some great, empathic ideas in here.

7 Top Christmas Gifts Of 2007 For Older Men
By Peter Crump

He's a little older now, his hair is greying a little, or alot, and he's a bit slower than he used to be.

But you love him more than ever and you need a hot Christmasgift for him this year and you're completely out of greatChristmas gift ideas.

Here's 7 top Christmas ideas for an older man.

1. An LP to iPod converter. If he's like me he still has asecret stash of LPs tucked away somewhere that he loves tolisten to, but doesn't any more because his equipment is broken,or just too old. How about a turntable that converts his LPs into a format to play on an iPod or Nano, with software to help eliminate those annoying pops and crackles that are so common on LPs?

2. An iPod or Nano. Chances are there's no point in giving hima turntable to convert his old LPs into a format to play on his iPod or Nano, because he doesn't have one. Get him an iPod andhe'll understand why the kids love them so much. Or get him numbers 1 and 2 together for his Christmas gift and he can listen to his old LPs anywhere he wants.

3. A 35mm slide or negative to digital converter. So he canconvert all his old slides and negatives to digital format.Digital photos are so useful, there's so many things he can dowith them. And he can convert all or some of his old slides andnegatives to digital, load them all on his computer and they'reall there, ready for a slide show.

4. A gutter cleaning robot. He's getting a little past climbingup on the roof now and would rather employ someone else to cleanall those leaves out of the gutters.

Why not save him the money and give him a gutter cleaning robot for Christmas. It cleans leaves, small branches and dirt out of his gutters. Designed by roboticists from the US army, it's controlled by a hand held remote and runs on rechargeable batteries.

5. A peaceful progression wake up clock. Rather than the rude awakening he probably gets from his clock/radio alarm now there's an easier way. Half an hour before wake up the clock starts to glow slightly, brightening slowly and warming releasing aromatherapy aromas into the bedroom atmosphere. Then a slow increase in personally chosen sounds of nature, culminating in an alarm at wake up time.

The perfect Christmas gift for the man who's earned the right to a peaceful wake up. And it can work in reverse to encourage him to sleep if he doesn't sleep as well as he used to.

6. An acoustic ear warmer. Like me he probably doesn't hear quite as well as he used to, and feels the cold more than he used to. Give him some ear warmers that allow him to hear clearly. Designed to allow sound to pass through so he isn't always asking you to repeat what you said.

And suggestion number 7 for a top Christmas gift idea for your favorite older man this Christmas. A remote controlled beveragebuggy.

It's a scale model dune buggy that has holders for 2 16 oz cansor bottles of his favorite drink. He holds the remote and sendsthe dune buggy to the fridge where one of his willing accomplices put his 2 drinks in it to send back to him. It's a laugh and it allows him to consume whatever he wants to drink without getting off the chair. After all, he's earned it.

Now there's 7 quite unique Christmas gift ideas for the older man this year. So I don't want to hear excuses that you can't think of a single idea, ok?

About the Author: Peter calls himself The Mens Gift Guru andpublishes a website called Find That Gift For Him athttp://findthatgiftforhim.com/, all about mens gifts, includingChristmas gifts for men at http://findthatgiftforhim.com/category/christmas_gifts/ where you can read about these and other great Christmas gift ideas.