Emotional Intelligence with The EQ Coach

The peaceful moment
A BLOGGER WRITES about a moment of emotional intelligence:

Before the Storm
Sitting in my car watching the sun rise, I’m calm. I just finished a workout at the gym and found a quiet spot on a quiet road to pull over and enjoy my breakfast-to-go. This may be my last opportunity to feel this way for a while.

On Saturday, I leave for Italy; then one day after returning, board another plane for Malaysia. Frantically preparing for two weeks away from my home & office is all I’ll be doing once I pull away from this calm spot. So I linger - chewing on my bagel - and enjoy the last few moments of quiet before a firestorm of activity kicks in.

This struck me as such a great example of emotional intelligence. This is someone who really knows themselves, and their feelings. And good vacabulary, i.e., he might have said "before the nightmare begins" or "before I go nuts," or dramatic things like that, be shows remarkable restraint in this writing.

These are feelings we can all relate too - the frenetic energy of travel and being away from homw, especially for business.

But how many of us have the emotional intelligence to find a quiet moment and pull over the the side of the road and rest.

Well, I did the other day. I'd been in the car seemingly all day. Well, a drive, then a 3-hour appointment, then an hour's drive, and I arrived at the destination early. It was mid-afternoon, and I've never really wanted to give up my preschooler's afternoon nap, so I pulled off the road to grab 40 winks. Except in this case, I pulled into a large and empty church parking lot, because I thought I'd be safe there. I was way over by the dumpster, and there were just a couple cars way over on the other side.

I laid back the car seat, opened the windows, and leaned back to relax. Several minutes later there was a knock on the window. Some man was concerned about the daycare there and not wanting the children to ... you know. The knock on the window scared me and took away all the good effects of the rest.

So - remember - it's emotional intelligence but alsological/intellectual intelligence, i.e., next time I won't choose a church parking lot!

And back to our friend, above. I feel sure he handled the travel well. He sounds like that kinda guy.

Call Susan Dunn the Emotional Intelligence Coach for help in increasing your emotional intelligence. I offer online courses, email support, phone coaching, and in addition, I train and certify coaches internationally. Don't wait. Do it now. Before the firestorm of activity begins. Again. sdunn@susandunn.cc or 817-734-1471.

Emotional Intelligence

Great speaker on emotional intelligence
Keynote motivational speaker, Rachel Green, on emotional intelligence & self-confidence




Susan Dunn, Emotional Intelligence, can help you improve your emotional intelligence. Email me at sdunn@susandunn.cc for programs, coaching, and resources.

Elephant Rescue - Limbic Brain

From Susan Dunn's THE EQ COURSE(tm) which can help you increase your emotional intelligence. Email sdunn@susandunn.cc to find out how to sign up for this online course, self-paced, adult learning. Individual emotional intelligence coaching also available.

We share the limbic brain with all mammals. The limbic brain is what enables this sort of behavior.

This video called Elephants Have Friends Too, is about an elephant in distress and other elephants come to its aid. This is the limbic connection at work. We share the limbic brain with all mammals.

Elephants Have Friends Too - Funny blooper videos are here

Otello, a story of emotional intelligence gone bad

Susan Dunn the EQ Coach talks about Otello (Othello) the story of emotional intelligence gone bad



Is one of your New Year's resolutions to improve your emotional intelligence? If so, please let me help you. Email me at sdunn@susandunn.cc to learn about the numerous products, services, programs and tools I offer, along with personal coaching.

here is Niun Mi Tema, Verdi, from the opera Otello

University of Haifa studies shows how valuable employees with high emotonal intelligence are to their employees - and predicts even moreso in the future

What took so long -- highly touted news release from Haifa, Israel, that emotional intelligence is highly valued in employees.

I got into this field 10 years ago because I knew I was on the upside of the curve for the greatest discovery in a long time. You see, emotional intelligence can be taught, it can be learned. I've coached people all over the world in emotional intelligence, and have trained and certified coaches to do the same, all over the world.

CALL ME NOW FOR EMOTIONAL INTELLIGENCE COACHING - 817-734-1471

Excerpts from the article. Read the full article HERE.

Emotional intelligence refers to a person's ability to "read," understand and deal with emotions -- his or her own and those of others.

Study indicates employees with a high level of emotional intelligence were more satisfied with their jobs and were more committed to their organizations.

They also had fewer undesirable work attitudes -- such as burnout, intention to leave and negligent behavior.

"This study has shown that employees with a higher level of emotional intelligence are assets to their organization"

"I believe it will not be long before emotional intelligence is incorporated in employee screening and training processes and in employee assessment and promotion decisions."

Susan Dunn, Emotional Intelligence Coach since 2000
sdunn@susandunn.cc

But how can I USE emotional intelligence?

But How Can I USE Emotional Intelligence?
I'm sure you're hearing the term Emotional Intelligence. It's being talked about a lot these days. For most people there's an immediate 'click'. We recognize it as the missing piece!

It's like that cartoon of the girl saying, 'Oh, I knew I forgot something. My career!' Well, in this case, we become aware that someone, somewhere along the line forgot to tell us how to be smart about our emotions. At least in words we could understand!

But then again are you or are you not 'smart' about your emotions? You see we don't even know how to assess how we are with our emotions. It simply hasn't been talked about it ways that makes sense and would allow us to use the information we receive.

If someone says, 'You're too reactive,' what does that mean? In relation to what or to whom? And aren't they usually talking more about themselves? Usually they mean 'You're more reactive than I am' or 'You're more reactive than I'd like you to be.' They may be the kind of person who could have a firecracker go off next to them and not 'react,' but what does that mean in relation to their ability to function and relate? Not much!

And then the next day you'll have a pounding headache, or have been up all night with the baby, and fail to respond immediately to a comment someone makes and they'll say, 'Why don't you respond? You just sit there.'

One standard would certainly be how well things are going for you at work and at home, because our EQ is more important to our happiness, success and health than our IQ.

POSITIVE FEEDBACK LOOP

The people I've worked with in Emotional Intelligence take to it immediately. There are immediate applications to their life they try, and the results are positive, so there's an excellent and immediate feedback loop that keeps you motivated and improving.

One of the best things about it is that you learn the tools, and then the applications are all around you. No matter what situation you're in, or what circumstance, increasing your Emotional Intelligence skills will help. You'll become more aware of what's going on around you ' the things you couldn't quit 'grasp' before. You'll also become far more knowledgeable about what's going on with other people, and isn't that always the most difficult thing to figure out?

COMPETENCY EXAMPLE

Here's is an example. One of the Emotional Intelligence competencies is emotional expression. It's important to understand that 90% or more of any person's emotional expression takes place nonverbally. That means ' ta da ' you need to increase your skills in being able to notice and INTERPRET nonverbal behavior. This means the expression on the person's face, how they sit, how they walk, their tone of voice, their silences, and other important 'cues' as to how they're feeling.

Why is this important? They may be telling you how they think, but how they feel is what's going to influence what action they take, whether they buy the product, whether they hire you, or whether they marry you.

AT-WORK APPLICATION

If you are charged with motivating others, you must be able to communicate well, and you must be able to read their nonverbal communication. Motivation is a feelings thing, not a thinking thing. If you can connect with what's important to the person you're dealing with, or connect everyone to an idea or mission they can feel strongly about, you will have your motivation.

At the same time, you need to be able to read the level of the 'buy in' from the other person. They may say they're going to do the project, call the person, raise the annual fund 100%, buy your product, or give you a promotion 'some day,' but, since 90% of most communication is nonverbal 'wouldn't it be better if you have studied Emotional Intelligence?

AT-HOME APPLICATION

Our work is important to us, but our home is where we live. If your relationships at home aren't going well, nothing at work will matter. And the sad thing is, most of the time if you aren't get along at one place, you aren't at the other. Why? Because we don't leave 'ourselves' behind when we leave for work in the morning.

This is not to say the applications are the same ' because an intimate relationship is different from a work relationship, but only in some areas. Increasing your intimacy and parenting skills is part of emotional intelligence. Couples who communicate better have better marriages, and one of the best things you can give your children is knowledge of Emotional Intelligence and good modeling of emotionally intelligent behavior.

MULTICULTURAL APPLICATION

Walk in any office today, or any family gathering, and you are going to have people from different cultures, yes? This means you can no longer predict how people are going to behave. In one culture, you show up on the hour. In another culture, you show up 15 minutes late. In still another, it's an hour late. These cultural differences affect our daily lives more all the time, and strong Emotional Intelligence skills are required in order to manage them.

BEING IN THE KNOW

As more people learn about Emotional Intelligence, it's going to be important that you stay in the loop. Get in early. It's the emotionally intelligent thing to do!

HOW TO LEARN EQ?

One of the most important things to understand about Emotional Intelligence is that, unlike some other life skills, it can't be learned ONLY be reading. There are Internet courses you can take, and books and ebooks you can read, but you need to work with someone such as a certified Emotional Intelligence coach who can guide the learning process.

It's difficult to change something you can't see clearly ' and we don't see ourselves as others see us!

Yes, time usually brings improvements in the area of Emotional Intelligence, but you can greatly accelerate the learning curve, with great benefits to your life.

HOW TO BEGIN?

Taking an EQ assessment is a logical starting point - http:/ inyurl.com/z94t . Don't be surprised to see that you're better at some competencies than others. The ones you are lower in can be raised, because EQ can be learned!

About the author: ©Susan Dunn, MA, The EQ Coach, http://www.susandunn.cc . I offer coaching, distance learning, and ebooks around emotional intelligence for your continued personal and professional development. Transition, career and relationship coaching. Mailto:sdunn@susandunn.cc for FREE ezine.

Toby Keith - A Little Too Much Amygdala

We've had opera on here,R&B, now a little more C&W.

Here is Toby Keith's "A Little Too Late." A story of the amgdala hidden in here. Some "intermittent explosive disorder"?

At the end, he does a "j.k." but -- and not to belabor what is 'just a song,' too much of this in a relationship will wear the other person out.



How do you learn to manager your anger? To live with an over-active amygdala? If females had written the shrink-terminology, THIS would be "hysteria" and "drama." Yes, guys do it too. And anger has beenc called "the all-purpose male emotion."

Take THE EQ COURSE and find out more. Email met at sdunn@susandunn.cc .

Study shows emotional training does work!

To buy ebook, go HERE.

Notes from article: Emotional Intelligence training does work - 08-08-2009

Finding has profound implications given the number of positive outcomes, including improved health and occupational success, that are known to be associated with having greater emotional intelligence
one recent study even found a weak link between EI and orgasm frequency in women!
After training and at 6-month follow-up, the training students but not the control students showed improvements in aspects of "trait" emotional intelligence normally considered immutable, including improvement in emotion identification and emotion management (of self and others' emotions).
Surprisingly perhaps, "emotional understanding" showed no improvement.

"Overall these results are promising," the researchers said, "as they suggest that, with a proper methodology relying on the latest scientific knowledge ... some facets of EI can be enhanced but not all."

Findings could have potential application in health, educational and organisational settings

We know EQ training works. I have plenty of testimonials from emotional intelligence training clients and coaches. Give it a try!

Why Doctors should get Emotional Intelligence Coaching

"People just don't sue doctors they like," said leading medical malpractice lawyer Alice Burkin. She continues:

"In all the years I've been in this business, I've never had a potential client walk in and say, 'I really like this doctor, and I feel terrible about doing it, but I want to sue him.' We've had people come in saying they want to sue some specialist, and we'll say, 'We don't think that doctor was negligent. We think it's your primary care doctor who was at fault.' And the client will say, 'I don't care what she did. I love her, and I'm not suing her.'

This was quoted in "Blink," which is about intuition, gut feeling, "social skills," etc. Burkin states litigious client as saying things like -- "She never looked at me as a whole person," and the doctor didn't treat the person "like a human being."

In further research, Wendy Levinson found that never-sued surgeons had spent more than 3 mins. longer with each patient -- 18.3 v. 15 mins.

Doctors who had never been sued also did these things - all realted to high Emotional Intelligence (EQ) which can be learned:

--The never-sued doctors made "orienting comments" like telling the patient he/she would allow time for question
--Engaged in active listening
--Doctors who got sued had voices that sounded "dominant", not warm
--Their tone of voice communicated respect and a dominant tone of voice is "corrosive" and gets the doctor sued

"Blink" author Malcolm Gladwell says when you visit a doctor and sense he "isn't listening to you, that he's talking down to you, and that he isn't treating you with respect, listen to that feeling.

That feeling is your INTUITION. It's your surest guide.

Emotional Intelligence (EQ) coaching -- with practical examples and exercises -- can help you hone your intuition. It may help you keep from being sued, if you're a doctor. It can help all your relationships, and there is always room for improvement. Take an EQ assessment, get coaching. It can also be crucial to your HEALTH, since, as Candace Pert showed, our emotions live in every cell of our body. 5 minutes of anger can suppress your immune system for up to 8 hours.

What are Reptiles on Caffeine Like?

I'm reading Brooke S. Musterman's "Reptiles on Caffeine," and enjoying it so much. I'm quoted in it quite a few times. "People are strange," it begins ... and Brooke tells about the strange behaviors encountered at a Cafe, much of them stress-related. We learn a lot about the reptilian brain.

What's the reptilian brain? It's the oldest of our three ("Triune") brains, and its influence is automatic, programmed, and quite often outside our conscious awareness. It's the brain we share with reptiles (who do not have a limbic brain, which we share with mammals, nor a neocortex, which humans alone have.) Because it is the oldest, and concerned with survival, it is the most powerful. It pays to get to know it ... here's why.

As Dr, Suzanne LaCombe writes in her article, "What's with the Reptile?":

...almost everyone underestimates the influence of the reptilian brain.

The reptilian brain (comprising the brainstem and spinal cord) in combination with our limbic system is in effect where the personality resides: our idiosyncracies, our way of being with others, who you are emotionally and behaviourally.

[The reptilian brain and limbic system] form the biological infrastructure of the right brain.

From Reptiles on Caffeine:

The reptilian brainstem is like a bodyguard who is constantly watching your back, constantly scanning the environment for threats.

You can see that getting this on a chain would be important.

Because it involves the right brain, if you want to make changes in your self, your beliefs, your thinking, your reactions, your "personality," and therefor your LIFE, you need to engage the right brain. ("Change your self, and your world changes.") See my ebook "Changing Beliefs". The title, BTW, in fact the topic, was suggested to me by a client. Someone who was obviously ready to learn and grow and change.

The right brain holds the old neuropathways carved in infancy, when you first started relating to others and learning about your world. Our brains are called "plastic," because you can continue to form new pathways probably your entire life. You can learn to modify these, change them, and even form new ones. Then you can change things that are not working in your life.

Want to learn more? Take THE EQ COURSE(tm). The material is even presented in a right-brained way to help get you started. What's a "right-brained way"? Well, you'll see in the Internet course, which includes workbook lessons that you email for feedback. It's adult learning, self-paced, affordable and effective.

It's doubly effective combined with personal coaching.

Susan Dunn, M.A., Clinical Psychology
Email me at sdunn@susandunn.cc

Can Obama Do It?

Now you know when an article from the UK leads off with Churchill, you'd better pay attention! Kennedy is mentioned. I throw in Abraham Lincoln. Let's do it. We need some inspiration right now!

From Can Barack Obama fix it? Yes, he can, London Times, Andrew Sullivan, is all about emotional intelligence. For instance:

At several points in the gut-wrenching emotional rollercoaster of last year [Obama] simply disappeared alone into a hotel room for a few minutes to gather his thoughts and restrain his feelings.

This is pure and simple EQ. In fact Abraham Lincoln said ...

"A drop of honey catches more flies than a gallon of gall ... If you would win a man to your cause, first convince him that you are his sincere friend ... On the contrary, assume to dictate to his judgment, or to command his actions, or to mark him as one to be shunned or despised, and he will retreat within himself, close all the avenues to his head and his heart.... "

And there is some quote by Lincoln I can't find - though many have said it it many different ways about stopping to think before you speak. It's part of emotional intelligence.

Leading paragraphs from the article:

Magnanimity in victory: that was Churchill’s advice. And since his precocious victory last November, Barack Obama has walked that Churchillian walk. It is not common in politics, especially after a meteoric rise past every prejudice, every smear and every Clinton, but Obama has an old soul’s perspective and an intellectually secure man’s confidence. Perhaps he has too much confidence — except that every time his friends feared that in the campaign, he proved them wrong.

From the shallow brittleness of George W Bush to the supple strength of Obama is a revolution in temperament and style not seen since Jimmy Carter gave way to Ronald Reagan 28 years ago. It signals the kind of administration that now looms before us: a conciliatory, inclusive, pragmatic form of liberalism. It’s a liberalism eager to learn from the insights of conservatives, and it is pioneered by a president-elect shrewd enough to know that generosity of spirit means more leverage and influence, not less.

I was talking to a client the other day who lives in the UK and he said, with that British politeness and restraint that I love -- you know, without mentioning any names -- that America "needed a friendlier face." Look at the photo included with the above article (which has Barack Obama's name spelled wrong, but we'll be seeing that a lot).

In this article, Sullivan reviews Obama's domestic and foreign policies and their chances for success. We all wish the best for Obama and hope and pray that he can, as we await the Inaugural speech tomorrow, and the coming 4 years.

The article is sprinkled with those qualities which can make a leader effective, and qualities that we associate with emotional intelligence:

• He shows every sign of meaning what he said (Intentionality)
• leaving divisive, destructive froth behind
• (During the past 16 years) the press learnt that cynicism was the only reliable guide to understanding politics and that world-weariness was the same as wisdom
• (getting out of) an emotionally familiar and comfortable rut
• Gave his chief rival and fierce competitor "the biggest job in his government"
• Has asked some Bush appointees to stay on
• Obama acts like a kind of antacid to the American stomach
• He has walked through the churn of racial and cultural and religious polarisation and somehow calmed everyone down
• Obama's speech re: Jeremiah Wright: "That Obama wrote and delivered it as he heard in his ears every racial stereotype that had pummelled his psyche for his entire life bespoke an emotional maturity that still shocks."
• He even managed ... to suck the drama out of the Clintons
• He never took the Sarah Palin bait (As I say over and over in my Handling Difficult People ebook -- don't take the bait!)
• Doesn't charm like Clinton did or Bush tried to ... he appears to have no need to be loved by everyone in the room
• Often finds it hard to disguise how tired he feels (emotional expression ... )
• At several points in the gut-wrenching emotional rollercoaster of last year he simply disappeared alone into a hotel room for a few minutes to gather his thoughts and restrain his feelings.
• More of a strategist than a technician
• Blend of pragmatism and realism
• Has the unerring instincts of a conciliator
• Has the rhetorical skills of a Kennedy or a Churchill
• Willingness to give others credit
• to approach issues with dispassionate pragmatism
• shift by symbols and speeches the mood and tenor of an entire country

Well that's just a taste. Read the article in its entirety; it's a good one. It ends with

Even now, as the outlook seems so dark, and as the inheritance seems so
insuperable, three words linger in the mind.

Yes he can.

And two words echo back at me.

Can we?

Which leads me, your blogger to sigh and pray:

Let's hope so.

MELTDOWN: Never Has There Been More Need for The EQ Course(tm) and Coaching

"Don't touch me," writes Keith. "I'm a live wire right now."

Keith finally achieved getting his bride and her child into the US from Nigeria this year and just found he has been laid off from his job, after buying a house and remodeling it which he knows he cannot resell right now were he able to find work anywhere.

Daily I receive emails, as if the screaming headlines weren't enough:

Economic Meltdown
1,000,000 Jobs Will Be Lost This Year
Seniors' IRAs Devastated
Foreclosures at All-Time High
Declining House Values
Stress Mounts as Markets Decline

People who may have, in the past, scoffed at the idea of "emotional intelligence," are now taking a second look, because emotions are in meltdown as well. The stress builds. The uncertainty. And the losses.

Alfredo's monthly payments from his IRAs are now 50% less. His wife writes me because he has become depressed and impotent, surly and agitated. Impossible to live with. "It's happened to everyone else," she tells him.

But this is different - because it happened to YOU.

Because of the economic crisis and the need, I am offering The EQ Course, which comes with unlimited email, and telephone coaching, as well as the Internet course, for just $79.95. This is less than half price. You can order it here. It comes with email support and coaching by telephone.

Learning about emotional intelligence, and getting coaching are crucial to managing the ravaging emotions we are experiencing now.

One woman I coach moved to a new town one year ago, has not been able to
find a job there, and is getting ready to move to another state to live with her
sister until she can stablize. This is two moves in 2 years and this woman
is over 50.

Click here to register and take The EQ Course(tm) for just $79.95. Offer good through February 1, 2009. For more information, email me at sdunn@susandunn.cc .

Client Michael: "This course saved my life."

Warning: Stress can make you (your brain) dysfunctional just when you need it the most.
But "you" are not your "brain," you are your EMOTIONS. If you're lucky enough to have a job, worrying about losing it can cause that to happen. This course does not talk about designer fads like "law of attraction" and "positive affirmations." This course deals with the real nitty-gritty.

And if ever there were a time for it, it is NOW.

Order the course now, before you forget. Being scattered is part of the stress. I can help you. Call me if you want more information: 817-741-7223.

Depression is not a "normal" part of Aging

If depression were a normal part of aging, as even some physicians and mental health professionals think, then what happened with Chad?

In 1995, he retired from his many years of practising medicine. In 1996, he went in to see a doctor about a kinked muscle from golfing and was scheduled for quintuple bypass the next day. Later that year, his namesake, favorite grandchild, honor student in college in theoretical physics and handsome enough to be a model, was committed to a drug rehabilitation residency facility for 12 months. In 1997, the young man was released, but continued drug abuse, piling up arrests, car accidents and incredible stress and fear in the whole family. In 1998, Chad's wife of nearly 50 years died after 3 months in the hospital. Chad's son, the father of the boy in rehab, was then diagnosed with congestive heart failure. In early 1999, the promising your grandson died of an accidental overdose, which devastated the boy's father (his son), who was put on anti-depressants, his health declined, and he began drinking heavily.

And Chad? One of those people bouyant in the face of adversity. In fact his family referred to him as "having the happy gene." He was a smiling and congenial, though grieving, host at the funeral of his wife, and memorial service for his namesake. He continued his social activities and golf, hanging out with his buddies at the club and at the broker's. In 2000, he moved with his son and family to a new town, where he lived in a separate house on the property, began making new friends there and dating a woman he met in town.

At this time, he was 80 years old.

Phillip is another example. He retired from years on the railroad, where he was popular with all. Then his wife had a stroke and was an invalid for a year before she died. The next month Kartrina hit, and Phillip lost everything except a box of photos. Did he curl up in mororse depression? Nope. He moved to Atlanta to be with his son, bought himself a new flatscreen TV (along with basically every other item one needs for a household), taught himself how to cook, has a lady-friend who watches opera with him, and is the one at the condos who introduces everybody to everybody else. He studies chess, plays scrabble, has the grandkids for the weekend, and goes to the casinos. He is now 83 years old.

What didn't these men become morose, depressed, and physcially ill with this stunning succession of real tragedies and losses in their lives? In fact, if either of them had shown up in the ER with signs of a stroke of heart attack, or had withdrawn into severe depression, who would not have said, "Well what can you expect?" In the space of 5 years, Chad basically lost the identity his profession had given him (many men die when they retire), his wife, his son (who became emotionally unavailable and began to drink), and his favorite grandson, and then moved to a new town, which would befuddle and depress many an octogenarian. Phillip lost everything - his wife, his house, every possession, and moved to a new town and started all over again at the age of 80. Smiling all the while.

The NIMH quoted on mental-health-today continually endeavors to educate that people like Chad and Phillip can be the norm, maybe ARE the norm ... that "old people" are not destined to become depressed.

I knew Chad well (now deceased, God rest his soul in peace), and Phillip for years. Yes, they were born with those temperaments we talk about in emotional intelligence. Just bouyant and resilient people. [But note that barring severe chemical problems, resilience can be learned - I teach it in my Emotional Intelligence course and people who have taken it say their resilience has been increased.] See my Emotional Intelligence (EQ) Course and ebook on Resilience.

Like most people with high EQ (see articles on leaders with high EQ who are maneuvering their corporations well through this economic crisis, making difficult and risky decisions), Chad was able to make high risks with good judgment that paid off. Chad drew out all his life insurance money and IRA money and invested it all -- everything he had -- in a piece of land affronting a ranch where oil was being pumped, making sure the mineral rights were included, and sure enough, the hit oil, allowing him an early and comfortable retirement.

With resilience, he was able to "let go" of his 40 years of being a physician, with grace, and move on. To what? He never lacked for ideas.

Chad continued to be sociable until the day he died, always the life of the party, always ready to golf, travel, meet new people, eat out - whatever was going on. Phillip is basically the unofficial "host" of his condo complex, which he refers to as "a 5-star resort" with his usual positie attitude.

Emotional intelligence studies tell us that ISOLATION is worse on health than high blood pressure, smoking and obesity combined.

So to reiterate: Although "older Americans ... are disproportionately likely to die by suicide...among the highest rates (when categorized by gender and race) were white men age 85 and older...more than 5 times the national US rate of 10.6 per 100,000.... And among the nearly 35 million Americans age 65 and older, an estimated 2,000,000 have a depressive illness and another 5,000,000 may have 'subsyndromal depress,' according to NIMH ... in any of these forms ... depressive syptoms are not a normal part of aging.

It is true that many older Americans face serious illnesses along with losses and various social and economic difficulties, but NIMH stresses that health care professionals, the general public, and sufferers themselves, should not conclude that depression is a "normal consequence" of these problems.

Says NIMH: "Depression can and should be treated when it co-occurs with other illnesses, for untreated depression can delay recovery from or worsen the outcome of these other illnesses. The relationship between depression and other illness processes in older adults is a focus of ongoing research.

Two points are important here.

1. Depression is not a normal part of aging, or the things we associate with aging (loss, illness, decline)


2. Learing more about Emotional Intelligence can help you at all stages of life. It can be particularly important as you age and stressors build - whether it's having teenagers at home while having to care for an aged parent, becoming debilitated with age, losing loved ones, adjusting lifestyle, moving or the other things can come along with age, the more you understand how emotions work and the choices that you have, the better off you will be. Studying Emotional Intelligence and practising it is not a substitute for medication, when medication is needed (as in bipolar, for instance), but is a win-win endeavor. It helps anyone - from children to centenarians. (See my ebook Teaching Your Child Emotional Intelligence.)
3. If you, or someone you know is depressed, please seek professional mental health care. It is not a normal condition, one that's "part of growing old."

Email me at sdunn@susandunn.cc for more information on my highly-acclaimed Emotional Intelligence course. And yes, I have coached many seniors. The course is on the Internet with email and phone support. Coaching is a marvelous adjunct to learning.

Resilience and Bouncing Back

The latest poll shows 45% of Americans are angry, afraid ... or maybe it's 60%, or maybe just about all of us have some serious concerns about the state of the economy in the US right now.

At my corner convenience store I see people bringing in bags of pennies saying they hope it will buy enough gas to get home. A 26 year old talks about filing bankruptcy. The manager gets 5 or more job applications a weel. And there was a short on TV about how we could now get the right order at a fast food restaurant because there are now so many "over-qualified" people working there.

How RESILIENT are you? You can take the EQ Map and find out. Or you can find out empirically, by taking a look at how you are handling things right now.

Resilience is about bouncing back (with hope!), or "boundin' ". Enjoy!

Boundin - Pixar animation - Pixar Studios

Job Traning: Smile and Greet People

SMILE AND GREET THE CUSTOMER

I can't think of any store I go into these days where the staff or "customer service representatives" have not been trained to smile and greet the customer immediately and pleasantly - or else "get written up."

It is politically correct to smile these days. Nearly everyone does, in public.

Just one thought from the venerable Maya Angelou:

If you have only one smile in you, give it to the people you love. Don't be
surly at home, then go out in the street and start grinning 'Good morning' at
total strangers."

- Maya Angelou

It is part of your personal power, emotional intelligence, to be able to manage your emotions and use them for win-win outcomes. For emotional intelligence coaching, or to become a certified emotional intelligence coach, email me for information at sdunn@susandunn.cc or visit my website, www.susandunn.cc .

Use Emotional Intelligence to Win in the Stock Market

USE EMOTIONAL INTELLIGENCE TO WIN IN THE STOCK MARKET

Emotional Intelligence helps you play the stock market and win.

From Business Day -- "Street Dogs: The winning traits of market wizards" -- to read the whole article go here: Business Day - News Worth Knowing

Fenton-O’Creevy, who studied 118 professional traders for several European investment banks, found that successful traders tend to be emotionally stable introverts who are open to new experiences.

Trading coach Brett Steenbarger says his study of 64 traders demonstrates ... “one important lesson: success in trading is related to the ability to stay consistent and plan-driven."

Consultants at Market Psychology Consulting, a US firm that coaches market traders, found that the following characteristics produce superior results:

n Low emotional reactivity: Emotional stability is considered crucial, especially during periods of market turbulence. In one study [they] measured traders’ heart rate, blood pressure, and skin conductance while trading and found that more experienced traders had less physiological reactivity to information surprises.

n Low illusion of control and a belief in the occurrence of chance events.

n Low overconfidence: Referring to a misappraisal of one’s foresight, talent, and abilities as being better than they really are.

n High Self-discipline: As it relates to how we manage our impulses. Self-disciplined people are better able to control and channel their impulses towards goals.

n Self-awareness: In the sense of an enhanced consciousness of one’s own physical and emotional state. Additionally, self-aware individuals often have logical reasoning behind their choices and behaviour. Self-awareness is also one of the key traits of individuals who have high emotional intelligence.

If you would like to increase your self-awareness and emotional intelligence, and WIN, email me for coaching, sdunn@susandunn.cc. Take THE EQ COURSE for better emotional intelligence, stability and self-awareness.

For Leadership you must have Emotional Intelligence

WHAT DOES IT TAKE TO BE A WINNING LEADER?

Blackbird Leadership are Management Consultants & Executive Coaches specializing in Leadership Development, according to their website.

Take a look at the first thing they list under their leadership approach:

Blackbird Leadership's approach
Emotional intelligence, emotional intelligence, emotional intelligence!

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Here at EQ Central, we specialize in training and certifying emotional intelligence coaches, as well as working with individuals and professionals (lawyers, doctors, therapists, professors) and others interested in increasing their own emotional intelligence.

Emotional intelligenge is key to leadership. It is like the "meta" skill. It is also crucial to wellness, happiness, and success at work and at home.

Reason No. 99 to learn EQ with us: "5 minutes of anger suppresses your immune system for up to 8 hours."

Today's quote about leadership: "What they know of him [the leader] must be what they hope and require." John Keegan, The Mask of Command

Come learn from the Emotional Intelligence Coach who trains the others. eMail me at sdunn@susandunn.cc , or call me at 817-741-7223 to discuss options and programs.

Susan Dunn, M.A.
Dean, Coach Certification and Training

Individual coaching in all areas
Coaching and training all over the world

Long-distance by phone, email

Seminars in Dallas and other cities

Online EQ Course (interactive with email, phone support)

Emotional Intelligence is Strategic Thinking

Emotional Intelligence IS Strategic Thinking.

In today's mailbag, an ezine from H. Glenn Ebersole, Jr., Founder and Chief Executive of J. G. Ebersole Associates and The Renaussance Group™, who is in my networking group.

Full of helpful information, Glenn entitles one article "Critical Skills Needed To Be A Strategic Thinking According to Your Strategic Thinking Business Coach." He defines strategic thinking as a process whereby you can arrive a good decision related to your work or personal life. "Strategic thinking," he writes, "involves developing an entire set of critical skills."

And what are those critical skills?

The first one he mentions is:

Critical Skill #1: They have the ability to use the left and right sides of their brain. This skill takes practice as well as confidence. Developing the logic and creative sides of your brain are tremendously valuable.

This is precisely the value of taking THE EQ COURSE and the coaching that goes along with it. Full of neuroscience (about the brain), it shows you how to develop your analytical thinking and then go beyond it to WHOLE BRAINED thinking or BALANCED BRAIN THINKING.

This allows you to zone in on the sort of thinking we call "gut feeling," where, if you're in business (or relationships), resides the best judgment, truest perceptions, and sounded decisions. Gut feeling, or intuition, highly developed (which you can learn through EQ) is why two financial advisers can read the same "fundamentals," (left brain, analytical) and one make a 20 bagger, and the other pick a stock that tanks.

TAKE THE EQ COURSE ONLINE WITH EMAIL AND PHONE CONSULTATION, OR COME TO DALLAS FOR A DYNAMIC AND LIFE-CHANGING 1 1/2 DAY SEMINAR. eMail me at sdunn@susandunn.cc for more information. Seminars are held monthly and can be arranged to meet your schedule.

STRATEGIC THINKING is essential for what you want to accomplish in your life. One of my top 5 strengths on the Strengths Finder is STRATEGIC. I can help you come up with the strategy AND I can teach you how the parts of your brain work, and how to get them working TOGETHER, for synergy. This is particularly important for men, where the communication between the right and left hemispheres of the neocortex is weaker and needs to be developed.

Contact me at sdunn@susandunn.cc for immediate assistance.

We train in Dallas in state-of-the-art facilities, strategically loved just 20 mins from DFW. All seminars led by Susan Dunn, M.A., Clinical Psychology, and founding member of Coachville.

Emotional Intelligence and Success in Business

People who consider emotional intelligence to be a "soft" skill are taking a second look. It can lead to hard results, of the kind you look for in business.

Experts argue that E.I. directly impacts productivity and profits. For example: Richard Boyatzis, professor and chairman of the organizational behavior department at Case Western Reserve University in Cleveland, assessed the senior partners in a multinational consultancy and found that those who exhibited E.I. competencies more frequently delivered over $1 million more in annual profits from their accounts than did other senior partners.

From "Management Skills," http://www.cio.com/

The best way to 'learn' emotional intelligence, to increase yours, is coaching. You can't just read about it, and if you knew how to put it in to practice, you would already be doing that because the results are so beneficial.

Paolo Pieri, FD of lastminute.com says Learn about Emotional Intelligence

Profile: Paolo Pieri, FD of lastminute.com - Accountancy Age

Paolo Piero FD of an online company says:

Be emotional: If you have the opportunity to learn about emotional intelligence, do so. It enables you to find the optimum way to interact with all types of people in order to get the best results.

‘Working with very senior people can make you feel intimidated or inspired, depending on how your emotional intelligence is developed. It’s a good skill to identify as it’s a real differentiator. Other more technical skills are great to have but are often taken as a given.’

You have a chance to learn about emotional intelligence here. Email me at sdunn@susandunn.cc for more information on this exciting program that can amp your career and relationships in ways you can't imagine.