Tuesday, January 09, 2007

Should I Write a Thank You Note?

SHOULD YOU WRITE A THANK YOU NOTE?
See the full article HERE. ALso includes sample 'thank you' notes.

From the happynewsnetwork blog:

Good morning! Just a quick note about this one: the reason I think this is a happy news story is that it is about bloody time somebody began to talk about the much-needed comeback of manners...the way that people act these days is disgusting! We, as a society, need to remember our manners, act more politely, and set a better example for the young ones around us. We bitch and complain about today's youth having no class/manners, but can we blame them? They learn from us - and we aren't always stellar examples!Okay - soap box put away, rant over....

I will continue.....

Thank you notes make a comeback -- as e-thanks By Belinda GoldsmithThank you notes, once feared a dying form of correspondence, are making a comeback via e-mail and text messaging but etiquette experts are still struggling to endorse anything but a handwritten note.

Peter Post, a director of the Emily Post Institute that offers etiquette and manners advice, said increasing numbers of people had stopped writing thank you notes and were telephoning instead to thank for a holiday gift or party.

But the proliferation of e-mails and text messaging on cell phones has prompted people to start writing again to thank people, with new technology creating a new form of etiquette."

E-mail has become an alternative way to send a thank you and you can see how text messaging could be considered another avenue," said Post, author of three etiquette books."Is it appropriate? If you are not going to thank them otherwise then it is better than nothing but I still don't think it is good as sending a note."

Some communication experts say teenagers and young adults who rarely took the time to pen a thank-you note to disappointed grandparents for their holiday gifts are now taking the time to say thank-you by e-mail and text message."

As more people get cell phones, we are seeing a rise in the number of thanks sent by text," said Delly Tamer, chief executive of online wireless retailer LetsTalk.com, which researches phone use."The younger generation who may not write a note do feel comfortable saying thanks by text or e-mail."

NO NOTE, NO PRESENT
Some traditionalists, however, still frown upon the use of new technology to thank someone for a holiday gift, with not all older friends or relatives having e-mail or cell phones."

A younger person would never think twice about this or think there is a better way but to text message a thank you really is completely unacceptable," said Gloria Starr, who runs etiquette seminars for U.S. company Global Success Strategies."

One good back-up strategy would be a quick e-mail with a hand-written note to follow."Starr said she feared hand-written thank you notes were disappearing, citing the example of a 17-year-old niece to whom she send a laptop last year as she started college. Having received no thanks or acknowledgment she telephoned her niece to check she had received the present and found she had. Starr proceeded to tell her niece how inconsiderate it was not to thank her and she would not send any more gifts. Days later a two page thank you letter arrived.

"She just had not thought of writing," said Starr.

Life coach and writer Susan Dunn said the expectations of a thank you letter tended to be age related." One of my 60-year-old readers said that if she does not receive a written thank you note, she does not give the person a gift again," said Dunn. "However I received the same comment from a 40-year-old. What age is the break-point? It appears to be around 35."

Advice columnist Melissa Kirsch, whose book "The Girl's Guide to Everything" is being released in February, said people were wrong if they thought paper and pen were obsolete with writing a thank you note on practice that was timeless."E-mail is disposable," she writes. "Handwritten notes take time and effort, and they literally send a message -- they say the recipient is valuable, cherished, appreciated."
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Here's something else I do. My son and daughter-in-law gave me a really beautiful sweater for Christmas. In addition to penning a thank you note, the next time I saw them (invited to their house for dinner), I wore the sweater.

If you're around the person who gave you the gift, let them see you using it and enjoying it. Have the book out on the coffee table, use the blender to make their drink when they come it, when they see you and say how relaxed you look, tell them it was because of the cruise or the massage gift card they gave you.

It makes everyone feel good. (You'll also get more gifts, silly!)

Call 817.734.1471 for coaching.

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