Sunday, April 29, 2007

Emotional Intelligence to be taught in schools in UK

Respect! Good manners to be taught in schools - Independent Online Edition > UK Politics

"Lack of civility" has prompted this school to revise their curriculum and include EMOTIONAL INTELLIGENCE. It isn't being learned at home, they claim:

The programme will be integrated into the curriculum, and will teach pupils about fair play and dealing with adversity.

The new moves to instil good manners in young people is the latest attempt to deal with what many politicians and commentators bemoan as a blight on British society, making streets, schools and communities unsafe and unpleasant. The worry is that children no longer have the authority figures to look up to and that the state has to an extent take on the responsibilities that belong to parents.

From September secondary school children will learn basic values and "golden rules" such as: "We are gentle, we are kind, we work hard, we look after property, we listen to people, we are honest, we do not hurt anybody."








The program will include learning how to deal with anger and disappointment.

To learn more, order my ebook "How to Teach Your Child EQ".

Saturday, April 28, 2007

Michael Jordan's Son to Play for Illinois

Michael Jordan's son plans to play for Illinois - NCAA Basketball - Yahoo! Sports


For perhaps it is in sports that we can most clearly see the drama of potential v. actuality (which take Intentionality); the interaction between natural ability, and the ability to use it to the best advantage, which means, in the case of sports, to win. And in a team sport, the ability to function so that the team wins. Individual ability can't carry it. Individual EQ can.

Sports coaches were emotional intelligence coaches before there was such a field. You can take the most physically adept, naturally athletic person, well-trained in the dribble and the shoot, and watch them self-destruct or soar, depending upon their emotional intelligence. Of course the same applies to the most IQ-adept person, but it's hidden, we don't get to see it. No matter how much you want to fantasize, there are no 5'1" females playing NCAA basketball.

Now the world wonders .... does young Jeffreay have what it takes?

Emotions motivate us (both from the same root word). They can also render us ineffective in mental and physical pursuits. They figure heavily in motivation. Will a boy attending Loyola in Wilmette have the drive? Michael is 6'6", and Jeffrey only 6'2". What about that?

The EQ will play to motivation, also determination, the ability to handle the lifestyle, and, importantly the ability to function within a team.

Considered by many to be the world's best basketball player, Michael was unable to play on wining TEAMS in the early years, though he set individual performance records, because he sometimes played at a level so above his teammates that the Bulls failed to function as a team.

There is also particular pressure on the son of a great man.

The world will be watching and rooting for this talented young man. I hope he has a good Emotional Intelligence coach.

Thursday, April 26, 2007

Coping with Change

SirsiDynix OneSource: Change – Arrghhhhh!

On the blog, Stephen Abram, MLS, talks about change and the emotional intelligence it requires.

Stephen is vice president, Innovation, for SirsiDynix, and the chief strategist for the SirsiDynix Institute ( He is an SLA Fellow, president-elect of SLA, and the past president of the Ontario Library Association and the Canadian Library Association.

What he's really talking about is the emotional intelligence competency of RESILIENCE.

Wnat to learn more? My ebook "Resilience" is available here.

Tuesday, April 24, 2007

New Leadership Development Track at Nations Oldest Utility Operations Conference

New Leadership Development Track at Nations Oldest Utility Operations Conference

Come learn emotional intelligence with me!

Minnetonka, MN (PRWEB) April 23, 2007 -- Midwest Energy Association (MEA) announced today that they have added a Leadership Development training track to help new and developing crew leaders, supervisors and managers enhance their management skills. The sessions are part of MEA's efforts to assist the industry with its serious workforce development challenges. With some utilities facing 30% or more retirements in the next 5 years, they want both the traditional technical sessions offered at the gas and electric conferences and Leadership Development. The new leadership training covers a range of soft skill topics including Workplace Relations, Contractor Alliances, Emotional Intelligence and Leadership Presence.

DMAE (Instant Face Lift Chemical) Injures Cells Permanently says Cell Biologist

"Instant Face Lift" Chemical DMAE Damages Skin Cells


According to Reuters:

"A chemical used in cosmetic products promising an 'instant face lift' makes wrinkles disappear by damaging skin cells, Canadian researchers report. 'From our point of view the cells are altered. They stop dividing, they stop secreting, and after...24 hours a certain proportion of them die,' Dr. Francois Marceau of the Centre Hospitalier Universitaire de Quebec told Reuters Health.

Marceau is a cell biologist and I hate to even THINK what made him decide to investigate this chemical so common in over-the-counter cosmetics.

This is why I recommend ARBONNE skin care products so highly.

ARBONNE products are researched by the Swiss and mfg in the US. They contain the purest of ingredients. This is important because what you put on your skin is absorbed into your bloodstream.

I was a houseguest the other week and made the mistake of using some of my hostess' face lotion sitting in the bathroom. My eyes got puffy immediately, and I felt headachy and "sick."

I asm very sensitive to chemicals ... are you? We all seem to be "sensitive" to DMAE.

Why not give ARBONNE a try. And order some for the "mother" in your life for Mother's Day.
Shop with me safely online at MyArbonne.

Emotional Intelligence is Learned at Home

The Daily Star Web Edition Vol. 5 Num 1028

From Bangladesh, Shahnewaz Khan writes about Emotional Intelligence.

"After reading the book, I understood the first sentence my programming professor at university said to us on the very first day: 'We can't teach programming at university This is a subject you should have already learned when you went to the park for a walk with your parents, or solved a puzzle with your mom in the living room, what we teach here is purely syntax (the grammar of the programming language), and brush up your analytical ability a little to ignite your talent.'"

Are you teaching your child Emotional Intelligence? Yes, you are. Whether you want to or not, whether you do a good job at it or not, you are teaching your child emotional intelligence .. so why not do it right?

My ebook, "How to Develop Your Child's EQ" will show you how. Order it HERE.

A mind is a terrible thing to waste. So it a heart!

A . . . angry
B . . . bitter
C . . . curt

and so it goes ...

Monday, April 23, 2007

When It Is a Fact, Not a Problem

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Emotional Intelligence is about reading reality correctly, amidst the emotional reactions pressing on your cognitive intellect.

I love this quote:

"If a problem has no solution, it may not be a problem, but a fact - not to be solved, but to be coped with over time." - Shimon Peres, Polish-born Israeli Politician

I like it so much because, with even normal intellect, solving a problem is easy. Dealing with a fact you don't like, however, is not, and requires a great deal of emotional intelligence.

Here are sme FACTS I've helped clients learn to cope with over time:
--An adult daughter who is damaged, vindictive and hysterical.
--A boyfriend who is, and always will be, a "stringer".
--A boss who has very low emotional intelligence and is a "difficult person."
--A colleague who is left-brained (or right-brained) and incapable of whole-brain thinking.
--Someone who thinks the client him/herself is a problem to be fixed.
--A controlling husband.
--An abrasive sister who likes to triangulate with the mother against the client.

With a FACT there are three (3) ways to cope:

+Change the situation;
+Change your attitude; or

The first two (2) pertain to IQ. The last one pertains to EQ.

Learn to know the difference!

Sunday, April 22, 2007

We're Just Friends but I Want More

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As an Attract Your Ideal Man coach, and expert for a major website, most of the questions I get fall into one of several predicatable groups. One of them is similiar to this letter.

Dear Susan:

We've been friends for years. I'm 30 and he's 35. I think we have a great relationship - lots of laughs and good times and we get along great. The trouble is I've fallen in love with him. I've never said anything. I want more. What can I do? Hint? Flirt more? I don't want to ruin the friendship, but I'm in love with this man. Please help.

Signed: Confused

Dear Confused:

If there's one truth in this world it is this: If the man wants "more" in a relationship, he will go for it -- no matter his age, "shyness," your situation, your attitude, your marital state, the nature of your current 'relationship,' or anything else.

I don't know if you are male or female, it doesn't matter, but this situation you describe takes place in offices all across the nation every day -- she's in love with her boss (or co-worker) and doesn't know...she thinks he does nothing because it's work, he's married, blah blah ...
Since I get to hear from so many people, here's how it works and these happen to be true stories with names changed, except for the last two.

1. 1. Mary wanted a divorce.

She went to Tom, a married divorce lawyer for professional help. Tom said, within 10 mins. and to her utter surprise: "I'm referring you to someone else because I want to date you."

2. Shereen was seeing a psychologist for whatever (in one of those states where you can 'date' a client once they aren't your client).

In the third session he told her he was terminating the therapy and referring her to another psycholigist because he wanted go have an intimate relationship with her. (He is the ethical type.)

3. Nancy had been in love with her boss, Larry, for 3 months, but #1, he was married, and #2, she needed her job and the policy manual said ...

In the 4th month, Larry asked her out on a date with direct innuendo. Nancy said "What about my job?" Larry said, "What about your job?"

4. Alicia is happily married.

She also can't stand a certain male client who had done some clumsy flirting. She ignored him. She managed to be away when she knew he was coming, assigned her part of the contract to her partner, wouldn't answer the phone if she knew it was he. Alicia had given him no encouragement, in fact quite the opposite. He tracked down her home phone number and asked her out.

5. Dr. John, an Ob.Gyn, put the move on Sandra during a physical exam.

He then left his wife of 25 years, and put his practice into jeopardy.

6. Samantha and Ted had been great friends for a year.

Samantha liked it that way. Ted wasn't her type. She had her eye on Roberto. Samantha and Ted went to the movies on Sunday nights. One Sunday night, to her complete surprise and horror, he reached over and touched her breast and then tried to plant a kiss on her.

7. Tiphany was a high-powered executive.

She hired Frank to be her secretary, file clerk and go-pher. The distance between their ages, rank, education, income and everything else was truly unsurmountable - from the outside, anyway. However, the first time she asked Frank to drive her to the airport, and they were, therefore, out of the office, he put the move on her.

8. Bill CLinton, married and the president of the United States of America, had an intern ...

9. The heir to the throne of England fell in love with a commoner. To marry her, he would have to abdicate the throne.

He did.

IN SUM: Unethical or ethical, disgusting or classy, appropriate or walking the line, interested in marriage or just sex, men don't let the grass grow under their feet when they want to "date" a woman. They aren't shy about it (no matter how timid they appear in other situations); they don’t care if they have a fiduciary relationship with her; they don’t care about anyone’s marital state; they don’t care about the policy manual; and they don’t care whether they and the woman are currently "friends", work colleagues, in direct work competition, or anything else. They could care less about "hints," "encouragement," or "flirting."


If he wanted something different with you, you would know it because he would take action.

(Incidentally, I have also heard from women who did take action with a guy like the one you describe, and got the guy to marry them, and down the line it doesn't work out. If he'd been interested and male, he would've taken action. If he didn't, but gave in, the woman is some kind of consolation prize, duty, last resort or something else you don't ever want to be.)

WORD: When a man wants something, he takes action and you don’t have to do a thing except defend yourself if you don’t want it.

Enjoy the friendship and attract another male who's interested in you that way. You'll know it by how he acts.
About the Submitter
This piece was submitted by Susan Dunn, Dating Coach, MA, Clinical Psychology, Founding Member of Coachville, Professional Coach - Dating, Life, Career, EQ, who can be reached at, or visited on the web at

Susan Dunn wants you to know that she offers individual coaching, Internet courses, ebooks and seminars. She serves as attract your ideal man on a major website, and has been a frequent lecturer on cruises. She also trains and certifies coaches worldwide in a long-distance, affordable, effective program. Email her for more information.

Friday, April 20, 2007

Paolo Pieri, FD of says Learn about Emotional Intelligence

Profile: Paolo Pieri, FD of - Accountancy Age

Paolo Piero FD of an online company says:

Be emotional: If you have the opportunity to learn about emotional intelligence, do so. It enables you to find the optimum way to interact with all types of people in order to get the best results.

‘Working with very senior people can make you feel intimidated or inspired, depending on how your emotional intelligence is developed. It’s a good skill to identify as it’s a real differentiator. Other more technical skills are great to have but are often taken as a given.’

You have a chance to learn about emotional intelligence here. Email me at for more information on this exciting program that can amp your career and relationships in ways you can't imagine.

Book Review: Train Your Mind, Change Your Brain by Sharon Begley @

Book Review: Train Your Mind, Change Your Brain by Sharon Begley @

Neuroplasticity ... and emotional intelligence.
It's a fascinating subject, the notion of neuroplasticity. We know that resilience (an emotional intelligence competency) is greatly enhanced in old age by learning new things. And this means something radically new, not just advancing in your own field, or learning to run instead of walk for exercise. This means the engineer who learns Italian, or the English major who learns how to ride a motorcycle, or the Spanish major who learns some math.

Getting OUT of your field.

That's why I greatly value "generalists" - - people who know a lot about many things, not just a whole lot about one thing.

Look around you at the seniors you know. Consider the total picture re: a person who was a doctor their entire life, then retired and gardens v. a person who had several career fields, reads voraciously, has radically different hobbies, and friends from many different sectors.

It's not just that the latter type person might be more interesting, there's a difference in the vitality level, and also the resilience.

Read the book review of Train Your Mind, Change Your Brain. It's fascinating!

I invite you to come study emotional intelligence with me. Check out my website at .

Coaching, consulting, Internet courses, ebooks, ezines, and more!

Monday, April 16, 2007

Examining the alpha male at work

Examining the alpha male at work -

As an early-adopter of EMOTIONAL INTELLIGENCE (EQ) I was thrilled to see this article. I, too, have studied the alpha male - - from the vantage point of EQ v. IQ.

Each of the 4 types of alpha males (commander, visionary, strategist, and executor) has its downside, says this article on's CareerBuilder, and, most interestingly, the climate is changing -- the alpha males may go the way of the dinosaurs as the influence of more women in the workforce has brought in emotional intelligence and affilitiave, collaborative behavior. Or is it the influence of more EMOTIONAL INTELLIGENCE in the workplace.

The great divide began when we had to leave Freud and Freudian psychology behind ... the drives - - sex and aggression - - well there's a lot more driving people today, like wanting to enjoy life, find meaning in their work, balance in their lives, and room for the emotional factor. Most important decisions must be made by other than strictly rational, logical means, after all. If you could choose the best stock rationally, all us investors would be millionaires - there are charts, after all. And if you could choose the best candidate for a job by their resume alone, it wouldn't be the miasma that it is, would it? No, it takes intuition, gut feeling, creativity, flexibility, and a host of other EMOTIONAL INTELLIGENCE competencies.

EQ (Emotional Intelligence) is now looked for as well as IQ in management, leadership and the workplace. In fact it's slowly being demanded in the workplace. If the average job in the US now is 18 months, one of the reasons people leave is because of abusive management. We cannot do our best work in an atmosphere of nit-picking, or where we're ignored, or devalued in comparison to data, for instance. And your EQ will tell you that most of us truly want to succeed, grow, learn, help others in the workplace to do the same, and to be appreciated. Not all the time, but just enough.

Take for instance the alpha male called The Executor. Probably my least favorite to work for because (to me) the Visionary is inspiring; strategists' minds are so fascinating and in my world they generally find a way to avoid much contact with people; and commanders are energizing. I worked for all of these types in my day (and that's why I'm not self-employed!)

Executors, however, are micro-managers who cramp your style, eschew anything creative or "outside the box," and never give priase, but rather pick, pick and pick, and most importantly, must assign blame. I've seen then stop the whole parade for as long as an hour or more, to get out their miocroscope and investigate a rather inconsequential incident. When I'm around one, I always want to shout, "Stop! Just fix it! Let your people free!"

So many things in the workplace today, particularly because it IS more collaborative, are a failing of systems or equipment, or simple one-time human error -- not something that can be fixed. And it takes a real micro-manager to stop the flow of a project, particularly under pressure of a deadline, to fly-speck and see "whose fault it was."

How much better to say to the human who failed at that one point, "That's not like you!" than to harp on the mistake. Someone who continually fails, sure, and particularly one who intentionally sabotages, but the average person having a bad moment or day ... well, it's NOT LIKE THEM, so move forward. Guilt, blame, tempers and anger accomplish th exact opposite of anyone's intent. And lets hope those few people, among them managers, who enjoy making other people miserable, are really on their last legs in the workplace.

Okay. Now I'm off my soap box. But I'm an emotional intelligence coach after all, and I KNOW that EQ matters more in managing people than IQ does. Perhaps the time has come to let the sheer intellect types work in isolation (which they generally prefer), and keep them away from management, which annoys both sides of the equation.

There should be ladders of promotion on two tracks - the people side, and the OTHER side.

The most heartening thing about the article is that emotional intellingence has become so well-known and valued.

We were an early-adopter and have helped so many people improve their lives, and the lives of those around them through emotional intelligence. It is truly the "common language," as I have trained and worked with people around the globe, who immediately catch on to the power of emotional intelligence.

Emotional intelligence is empowering. Get involved! See me for coaching, or to take the EQ course. Email me at

Friday, April 13, 2007

How to Win Anyone Over - MSN Lifestyle: Boomers

How to Win Anyone Over - MSN Lifestyle: Boomers

Studies show that humans, like other primates, possess an instinctive urge to "mirror" each other.

This is a great to-the-point article on "how to get along." It's full of emotional intelligence - nonverbal signals, the link between humans and other mammals that we call, in emotional intelligence, "the limbic connection." The idea that emotions are contagious (therefore it's important that you know how to "catch" them or not!).

Take a look!

Did you know that the bottom line on etiquette is making the OTHER person feel good. So flash that smile!

Thursday, April 12, 2007

Thank You Note

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It's so nice to be quoted, especially when it's about kindness and saying "thank you."

On Beck's cafe:

"Do it [write thank you notes} for gifts, acts of kindness or friendship, or just because. Often times we don’t do it as we aren’t sure how. And usually the ideas on how to do it are tailored only for thank you notes for gifts. But substitute “gift” for act of kindness or friendship and any concepts on how to write a thank you note applies. Susan Dunn, MA, A Professional Life Coach has this advice (remember substitute the word “gift” for some other act of kindness and her advice applies universally too), “When you write the note, mention the gift or gifts specifically. Mention some way that you will use it, or what it meant to you, how much you love the color red, or how you’ve been wanting to read that book”. (source and examples: “How to Write a Thank You Note and Why“, Susan Dunn, MA, Professional Life Coach, Emotional intelligence & Etiquette"

Etiquette comes naturally with emotional intelligence. We all like to be appreciated and thanked.


Just because!

Monday, April 09, 2007

Winning at Work

Charlotte Business Journal: Winning at Work

"Work hard," writes Connie Glaser. "Do your best. Know what’s expected. Create value.

Isn't this what we were taught? And since we are smart, capable and doing all the right things, we will get ahead -- right? Well, in today's complex workplace and competitive global marketplace, here is a startling piece of news: it is not enough."

Through coaching, she advises, many are learning the essential ingredients of success.

"The traditional ingredients for a successful career," she writes, "require combining technical and interpersonal skills, along with emotional intelligence. Mix in cultural astuteness, and you've got a recipe for success in today's workplace."

Benjack Glatzer defines culture astuteness as "the ability to get out of your office and your comfort zone, and navigate smoothly through the cultural nuances of your specific company."

And this requires a great deal of emotional intelligence.

The good news is that emotional intelligence (EQ) can be learned. Contact me for more information - .

Thursday, April 05, 2007

Learn How to Make Your Workplace Happier and More Productive

Learn about the 7 Key Steps to Make Your Workplace Happier and More Productive

THE MAJOR KEY IS WELLNESS ... being in top shape physically, mentally, emotionally and spiritually. Emotions effect our wellness - as Candace Pert, Ph.D. says, our emotions are in every cell of our body. Try ARBONNE for feeling your best. You cannot follow any of the 7 steps unless you are robust, energetic and healthy. Shop safely online with me at MyArbonne. I use only their products, cosmetics, supplements, lotions (they are PURE) and I haven't missed a day of work (or fun) in 4 years. Have you? What you put on your skin is absorbed into your bloodstream.
What's the key to a great workplace?

Emotional Intelligence ... according to Dr. Steven Stein, who studies emotional intelligence, or EQ, these are the 7 keys from his new book:

THE 7 KEYS (Go HERE to read the whole article.)

1. Hire capable people who love the work they do and show how they contribute to the bigger picture.

2. Compensate people fairly.

3. Don't overwork (or under work) people.

4. Build strong teams with shared purpose and viable goals.

5. Make sure managers can manage.

6. Treat people with respect and leverage their unique talents.

7. Be proactively responsible by doing the right things to win the hearts and minds of your people.

All of these are signs that the workplace has a high EQ or emotional intelligence. "Happy" people ar emore productive, and one thing we learn from studying emotional intelligence, which I like to combine with the StrengthsFinder assessment (because it is NOT all about "emotions") is that what makes one person "happy" in the workplace, does not make another person "happy."

Look around in an average office these days and you will find all ages, cultures, backgrounds, etc. I was observing one alpha male today. The office is under a huge crunch, and many are wearing down. This man absolutely LOVES to work and "churn it out." He gets HAPPIER as the pressure builds, more cheerful as the day progresses, and I find hi absolutely energizing. Why? Because emotions are contagious. There's nothing like a leader who can smile when the going gets rough, and can show what I call "grace under pressure."

Want to know more about it? Take the EQ course.


Tuesday, April 03, 2007

Birthday Feast for Favourite God Prince Philip

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Know anyone who's sitting at the base of a banyan tree waiting for ...
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At the base of a banyan tree...

They only recently learned his birthday is June 10th

"You must tell King Philip that I'm getting old and I want him to come and visit me before I die," said the white-haired chief, who thinks he is about 80. "If he can't come perhaps he could send us something: a Land Rover, bags of rice or a little money."

Oddly, people of Yaohnanen and surrounding villages worship the 85-year-old Prince Philip as a god, believing him to be the son of an ancient spirit who inhabits a nearby mountain.

See photo HERE.

* All jobs stink
* People are no good
*Lawyers can't ...
*Nobody cares about me
*Women are just after . . .
*All men want is ...
*Marriage is ...
*Bosses are ...
*English majors always ...
*The problem with all those ^&*)s is ...
*Nobody will ever ...
*If it weren't for bad luck, I'd have no luck at all.
*If only engineers/surgeons/mothers/dogs could ... I'd be happy.
*Purple sneeches can only ...
*When I get money/a wife/a better job/respect/a decent boss I'll be happy.
*I could never ...