The Concentration of an Airplane Pilot

There is a poem I cannot find at this time, about pilots ... about a boy looking up in the back yard as a plane flies over ... about "the concentration of good men."

I like analyze non-verbal communication. In the photo which is, to me, incredibly beautiful, someone to our left is taking the photo. There is someone to the right.

In this photo, there is one person looking directly at the camera - like you should be - and he is a pilot.

Do these pants make my butt look too big?

About honesty in relationships, and "the truth."

A constant sort point in male-female relationships has to do with "the truth." To many men, truth is an absolute.

There's a joke circulating about this now - one of many. Here it is:

A woman is standing nude looking in the bedroom mirror. She is not happy with what she sees and says to her husband, 'I feel horrible; I look old, fat and ugly. I really need you to pay me a compliment.'

He quickly replies, "Well you have perfect eyesight."

I hate to belabor the obvious on this one. It's a joke because we all know this.

IF you don't have tact, and if you confuse "honesty" with "the truth", as if you owned the truth ... please take some EQ training.

If you are a kind and decent person and a person needs reassurance, give it. It's the higher path.

The "truth" is a relative thing, subject to one's subjectivity. Kindness matters more in human relationships.

Testosterone, Emotions and the Stock Market

Very interesting article in THE WALL STREET JOURNAL, Science Journali CALLED "Testosterone May Fuel Stock-Market Success or Make Traders Tipsy."

Quoting from the article, som EQ-type tidbits:

• ...scientists exploored how the natural chemistry of fear, confidence and exhiliration can influence financial choices in ways that defy logic ...
• "We want to know how the endocrine system and the brain work together to produce financial behavior."
• from MIT financial economist Andrew Lo - "We need to understand that physiological aspects of brain behavior really impact financial decisions."
• To all surface appearances, "the experienced traders were quiet and poker-faced, in control," said Dr. Coates, a former Wall Street trader. "In fact, underneath their cool exteriors, their endocrine systems [emotions] were on fire. It is almost as if they had learned not only to control these hormones but also to harness them."

This is almost a definition of emotional intelligence -- i.e., learning to control/manage your emotions but, more importantly, to HARNESS them.

Want to learn how? Take THE EQ COURSE. Special retro prices until the emotional economy calms down. :-) email me at sdunn@susandunn.cc for more information, or visit www.susandunn.cc/EQcourse.htm and then email for special price.

We learn better when we learn together.

Emotional Intelligence is Good for Your Health

HEALTH: PSYCHOLOGY; Researchers Add Sounds of Silence To the Growing List of Health Risks - New York Times

This article was written in 1988 by Daniel Goleman for the N. Y. Times, and still we are only beginning to deal with the idea of emotional intelligence, wellness and social support.

It's important to note that if you cannot connect with people emotionally, you can be isolated and lonely in a room full of people.

It is hard to ignore data like this. It makes a very compelling case for developing your emotional intelligence.

From the article:

Being cut off from friendships and one's family doubles a person's chances of sickness or death ...

Although social scientists have long known there was a strong association between loneliness and illness, it was unclear until recent studies which was the cause and which the effect.

But the new studies, summarized in the current issue of Science magazine, show that a lack of social relationships in and of itself heightens people's susceptibility to illness.

''The data shows that people who are isolated but healthy are twice as likely to die over the period of a decade or so as are others in the same health,'' said James House, a sociologist at the Institute of Social Research at University of Michigan, a co-author of the report.

The report, co-written by two other researchers ... summarizes studies ... on the effects isolation has on health that have been done over the last two decades. In the studies, more than 37,000 people were assessed over periods of up to 12 years.

... ''It's the 10 to 20 percent of people who say they have nobody with whom they can share their private feelings, or who have close contact with others less than once a week, who are at most risk,'' Dr. House said.

More Risky Than Smoking

In adding to the list of factors that put people at an increased risk for disease, the report said social isolation ''is as significant to mortality rates as smoking, high blood pressure, high cholesterol, obesity and lack of physical exercise.''

''In fact, when age is adjusted for, social isolation is as great or greater a mortality risk than smoking,'' it added.

While smoking makes a person about 1.6 times more likely to develop illnesses of all kinds, social isolation makes a person twice as likely to become sick, the researchers said.
''After controlling for the effects of physical health, socioeconomic status, smoking, alcohol, exercise, obesity, race, life satisfaction and health care, the studies found that those with few or weak social ties were twice as likely to die as were those with strong ties,'' Dr. House said. '

Isolation is more devastating to men than to women ...

The comforting effect of another person's presence has been shown to lower not just heart rate and blood pressure but also the secretion of fatty acids that can block arteries.

Effect in Brain Theorized

One theory of why the presence of another person might help suggests that there is an effect in the brain from social contact. The theory holds that social contact inhibits activity in the posterior hypothalmic zone of the brain, lowering the rate of secretion of acetylcholine, cortisol and catecholamines, chemicals that trigger more rapid breathing, a quickened heartbeat and other physiological signs of stress.

Signs of Stress: The Body Reacts

Social isolation can have a broad range of physiological effects, notably on the brain and the cardiovascular system, among other major organs. Loneliness seems to lower the effectiveness of the immune system while increasing stress on the heart. One theory holds that social relationships can lower the rate of secretion of certain brain chemicals that cause rapid breathing, a quickened heartbeat and similar signs of stress.

To read the full article, follow the link above.

IF YOU KNOW SOMEONE WHO IS SUFFERING FROM ISOLATION, coaching is a great route for them to take. It is contact with another person who has their interests at heart. It is just as effective by phone and email, from an experienced and knowledgeable coach. Emotional Intelligence coaching helps us learn the social skills that keep us from being isolated.

Note the effects on MEN.

Take the EQ Course, email me for coaching, sdunn@susandunn.cc .

Pilots Need Emotional Intelligence

PILOTS BEING TESTED FOR THEIR EMOTIONAL INTELLIGENCE?

"You can't learn it in the classroom like your IQ stuff," says Dr. Stein, in an article about pilots and emotional intelligence. "To learn emotional skills, you've got to go out there and practise them in the real world. You've got to interact with people and think about how that interaction goes..." Some people have even brought in coaches to help them improve their EQ," he adds.

DO pilots need to have Emotional Intelligence? Yes, they do, we find out in an article called emotional workplace -- and indeed any workplace is "emotional." The funniest question I've been asked on my expert column was, "Do you think emotions belong in the workplace?" Hmmm. It doesn't matter what my opinion is -- or yours either, with all due respect -- because emotions are in the workplace whether you like it or not, like the sun in the sky.

And you must now how to deal with emotions in an intelligence manner in order to succeed -- yours, theirs, ours, his and hers. This becomes increasingly complex in the current multicultural scene many people work in.

From the article

Do you say what you think even if it upsets someone? Do you ask people for help if a task seems too hard? Do you find it hard to enjoy life? Are you happy? At your next job interview, it might be your inner self the employer is most interested in, not what's listed on your resume or stored in your brain. While experience and IQ opened doors in the past, organizations from Air Canada, American Express and Deloitte to the U.S. Air Force, are looking at EQ -- emotional intelligence -- as a key indicator of a person's success at work. We've all heard of IQ, but what is EQ?

"Emotional intelligence is your ability to be aware of your emotions, to manage them, to be aware of the emotions of the people around you and to manage those to some degree as well," says clinical psychologist Steven Stein... When you have emotionally intelligent leaders, managers and people, things go better."

Dismissed by some back then as a fad, Dr. Stein says there has been renewed
interest in the field today as companies recognize the value of hiring and promoting emotionally superior workers, especially with the increased importance placed on leadership, team work and office culture.

"People with higher emotional skills are more able to get help and muster teams, they're able to be seen more as leaders and are more likely to be put in leadership positions. They get promoted faster," he says. Indeed, while IQ might get a person through the door, success is largely a matter of EQ, says Dr. Stein. "People often get hired because of their IQ. But what happens once you're hired is, the ones who do better on the job are usually the ones with the higher EQ," he says.

Air Canada has used an EQ assessment on 650 new pilots hired since 2005.

"An airline captain is ... a team leader. He's overseeing the cockpit crew, the flight deck crew as well as the cabin crew. And he's not only interacting with the other crew members but also with other departments within the airline," says Capt. Dave Legge, vice-president of flight operations. "Obviously, if you have to interact well
with other people, these are instruments that we can use during the selection process to identify people that have these enhanced skills," he says.

Read full article here: The emotional workplace

To find out what your EQ is, take THE EQ MAP. Then get coaching. As the article says, you can't learn it just from a book.

Please note: The article ends with something about the coach helping them tell how they're feeling during different points in the day. EQ coaches do a lot more than that. Come find out! 817-734-1471, sdunn@susandunn.cc, http://www.susandunn.cc/ .