I haven't exactly kept up with the sordid details of the Mark Sanford's sordid little affair. Why bother. It's any or all of these: boring, predictable, disgusting, exacerbated by his apparent need to make it/keep it public, ho hum, blah blah.
We all know that some men do this. We all know an apology will not do. We all know that yes, it DOES reflect on one's ability to run a country/run a city/run a state ... because you cannot (no, you can NOT) separate a man's private behavior from his public behavior. And if he can't control himself with both marriage and career at stake, how could we expect him to control himself if there were really something important needing attending as governor of a state.
Jenny, Mrs. Mark Sanford, who comes from Winnetka, as do I, has so far moved only slightly off dead-center of every other political wife's reaction to this boring and disgusting behavior. She is not standing solidly beside her man, as Hillary and others have done -- for power, for money, for prestige, and basically what amounts to a horrible example to the young women of the world.
Jenny, Mrs. Mark Sanford, had a high-level career before becoming Mrs. and mother, but then so did Hillary.
Jenny has actually kicked him out, and spoken at least a degree or so more what one would like to here -- i.e., she told reporters that Mark's going to have to worry about his career himself, that she has the "character" of her family to look after.
The Sanfords, after all, have four SONS.
Shame on him.
If Mark couldn't behave like a decent human being for his wife, he might have done it for his sons.
There are few things that screw up a man like a father who has committed adultery, and this man has four sons. It is very hard for a boy to reconcile when his father has (1) made their mother cry, (2) caused their mother emotional pain, (3) done something every kid knows is "wrong", (4) may well lead to divorce ... I could go on and on.
Shame on him.
How Mrs. Sanford will ultimately handle this, the world is waiting to see. The effect on the boys ... will happen later. And a mere "apology" isn't going to do it.
See photo of Jenny with the boys here: http://www.scgovernor.com/NR/rdonlyres/79E04DF1-404F-42FB-8EF4-369DBF4C811B/0/jenny_boys.jpg
And men, don't write me letters saying "he used poor judgment." That doesn't pass the smell test. Mark Sanford used no judgment at all. Reptilian brain. You have to be THINKING, to use JUDGMENT.
Now how do you feel about having a governor (or even a pool repair man) who cannot THINK?
And, I still maintain, worse than that -- a man who would set such an example for his young sons, AND put them under that sort of psychological pressure.
"I'm sorry" just doesn't cut it.
We wait to see what Mrs. Sanford does. My heart goes out to her, but she's an adult. My heart goes out to the boys most of all. But Jenny will be the one who has to shepherd them through this and it is going to take a long time. And I have coached grown men who are still screwed up because their fathers fooled around on their mothers.
Wednesday, July 01, 2009
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