Tuesday, December 16, 2008

EQ Advice for the Week of December 16

WHAT DID YOU JUST SAY TO ME???!!!

We have an economic crisis. We have a new president - an unknown. We have the holidays.

Peace and harmony? Not likely.

There is stress from many areas - the budget, family, more to do, and the parties mean we eat and drink wrong. Some people have been hit in virtually every area of their life.

Stress affects our emotional set-point. Many people are on their last nerve. Stressed out and trying to cope.

So ... CUIDADO - Be Careful
It's easy for misunderstandings to happen right now, and even easier to say the wrong thing to the wrong person at the wrong time.

Caution is the better part of valor!

Tips for Surviving:
  1. Emotions are running in the background for all of us, and it clouds clear thinking.
  2. Be especially careful with communication with close friends, lovers and colleagues.
  3. Expect what you say to be misinterpreted so go over assumptions if need be.
  4. Misinterpretation and cloudy thinking can set off a constellation of misunderstanding.
  5. If this happens, nip it in the bud. Take time immediately to address it or it will escalate which will only complicate your life and add more stress.
  6. Slow down. Set back your own rheostat. Say less. Keep busy. Do things you know make you calmer.
  7. Assume a virtue if you have it not - slap on a veneer of aplomb and calmness. Emotions are catching.
  8. Put it off if you can.
  9. Of course "A stitch in time saves nine." Think before you speak.

In other words, watch your words. The smartest thing to do is approach all communication with care. All PEOPLE with care. This is simply not the time. In other words, the thing you're most likely to want to say is the thing you'll regret having said later.

If all else fails, disengage and walk away.

A lot of people are just plain out looking for a fight, to relieve the tension, and it takes two to play that game.

Lastly, as a friend of mine says - Keep your words sweet. You may have to eat them some day.

For a free mini-coaching session, email me at sdunn@susandunn.cc, or call 817-734-1471.

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