Monday, September 24, 2007

The Honesty of Emotions

A Private Talk On Honesty

In his article, "A Private Talk on Honesty," Harry Palmer, of Avatar(r), talks about honesty.
When I'm coaching in emotional intelligence, I start with the EQ Check-in. It is "How are you feeling ... emotionally ... spiritually ... physically ... mentally?" And then I listen to the answers.

For someone to reply honestly to these questions in everyday life would be rare, wouldn't you say? We walk in the office and say, "How are you?" and the other person replies, "Fine," even though they were robbed the night before, or are going through a difficult divorce.

From the article:
Honesty is a very delicate subject to talk about. In most circles, no one would ever be so tactless as to even bring it up. Pirates, criminals, swindlers and con artists proclaim their honesty most loudly. No wonder it has become a subject that tends to besmirch the speaker at its mere mention.

So I am aware that I am walking on the thin ice of the holier-than-thou, but this is an important subject. Without self-honesty, a person will substitute rationalized thinking for his or her genuine feelings. With such, the question, “What do you feel?” will evoke intellectual speculation (What should I feel?) rather than an actual experience of what is present.

Read the full article here: A Private Talk On Honesty

Emotional expression is one of the EQ competencies. You can see how you measure on it, by taking THE EQ MAP. Then if you'd like to work on your emotional intelligence, give me a call and let's get started.

We'll start with "How are you feeling?" No, really. How are you feeling?

Call 817-734-1471. Email .

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