Saturday, August 15, 2009
There is a special place in heaven for people who are not afraid to help other people -- I mean as in getting their hands dirty.
Some people are too busy or simply won't take the time. Others have a "high road" attitude, thinking that the other person "must" learn how to do this themselves, and may give conceptual directions while they stand on the outside.
It's the rare friend who will help as in -- just do it.
I think we have gone too far about the "co-dependence" thing. A new term is "inter-dependence." I prefer to take on the term "splendid isolation." It is NOT a plus to be in splendid isolation!
Let me give you an example. I was over at a friend's house the other day. Let's call her Joanna. Marsha, Joanna and I were there.
Joanna started to panic. We could see it all over her. It turned out she had a dinner party to do that night, and ... well to her, that was very stressful. She happens to be a high-level professional in her community. But to her, a dinner party was off the radar screen.
Marsha looked, picked up on what was going on and said, "Ha! Let me do this. I mean, I'll just DO IT FOR YOU. It's easy for me, fun ... go read a book or something. Leave it to me" and in about 30 mins. she had the table redone, the dishes ready, the meal planned, and all the stress off.
We both enjoyed watching her 'working,' as for her, it was clearly "easy" and "joyful."
Why not "help" in that way?
I guess that's the essence of coaching.